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Family Secret

Amina grew up in a small Indian village. Her father died when she’s barely 4 years old. She had no concept about death at that age, only remembered her excitement from a big family gathering with all grandparents, uncles, aunties and many cousins. Later when Amina grew up she was told her father had a big fight with her grandpa and he couldn’t stand it that he killed himself, and then there was a lot of blame to her grandpa. Also from here and there she heard rumors about her mother, that her father’s suicide could have something to do with her mother’s affair with a close uncle or could even be the grandpa. But her mother kept her mouth shut, and never wanted to talk about it despite Amina has been her main caretaker for so many years. Her mother never married again. Followed that there had been quite a few family secrets which puzzled Amina until today. As time passed, now most people involved in that story had passed, Amina wondered if the truth would ever be revealed to her.


The moment Amina entered the trance, she went back to her home village. She’s her current self. Her eyes filled with tears to see the familiar place where she grew up and thought she would never go back again. She felt she was compelled to go to her friend’s house, which was a couple of houses away from her own home. Opening the door, she saw an old lady sitting and staring into her eyes. She knew she was her friend’s grandma. She said:” I think she wants to tell me something, but I don’t know what.” Then a picture came into her mind - Her friend’s father, this grandma’s son hanged himself on a tree at the backyard not too long after her father’s death. Fact check with her own conscious mind, she knew that was what actually happened. She can feel the deep sadness from this grandma’s eyes. Not a word has been said. 


Several past lives memories popped out after that. In one life she saw herself as a pretty Pakistani girl. She fell in love with someone. But her family arranged for her to marry into a wealthy family and she gave birth to a lovely boy after a year. The husband was very abusive, both mentally and physically. Her son was her only relief in life. One day she couldn’t stand her husband’s abuse anymore and she stabbed him with a knife in self defense. She saw a lot of blood, alone with his son’s shocked eyes and screaming. For a couple of minutes, Amina’s whole body was shaking when she was narrating this part of the story. Her son never forgave her. He left her as soon as he became independent. She saw herself staggering in a big empty house, dead inside. The moment the soul left that body, she felt such a relief - “ I should have left long ago.” 


As the soul ascended into the light, the heaviness from that lifetime finally lifted. She’s in the deepest theta trance. She started to describe that she saw three light beings in front of her - She knew they were her father, uncle and grandpa. She sensed their love. I asked her to talk to them telepathically, to understand what actually happened that led up to her father’s death over 30 years ago. She was quiet for a while then said: ” I don’t feel any blame or shame from them. All I can feel is love.”  Then her body started to shake - “My father said he didn’t kill himself. He’s been MURDERED!” Now she saw the whole picture - Her father was a simple farmer, never showed much emotions. Her mother had an affair with the guy from the neighborhood. One day this guy purposely poisoned her father. She saw her father was collapsing in agony, foams around his mouth. The neighbor guy held him down. She saw her mother was trying to stop him in vain, crying and curled herself on the ground. She saw her father’s pupil dilated as he took his last breath. Tears trickled down from her closed eyes. 


After that she began a conversation with these three beings. They told her the rumors about her mother’s affair with the uncle or grandpa were all lies by her mother which served the purpose to cover it up. Eventually justice caught up, that’s why this neighbor’s guy who was also her friend’s father killed himself. Now she understood the sadness from that old lady. She also understood why her mother never wanted to talk about her father’s death. She couldn’t bear the shame in the truth. 


Amina was quiet for quite a while after she came back from the trance. She said this was way beyond her expectation. I can see she’s trying to process what she just revealed. Almost like talking to herself, she questioned: “Is that real? Is that what happened over 30 years ago?” Then she answered herself:” But it all makes sense now.” She’s going to have this conversation with herself back and forth in her mind for a while, and eventually she has to decide which to believe. After all, it’s what we believe creates our own world.



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